Tag Archive | addiction

July 31, 2017; Journal Entry 3: De-Carbonated

Well, it’s been 6 days without any carbonated drinks.  I’m pretty proud of myself for that.  I’m pretty well addicted to Pepsi, or any other soda.  I’ve known for a long time, and I didn’t need Dr. M to tell me, that carbonated drinks are SO bad for you.  I just hadn’t gotten to the point where I really cared enough about my own health to stop drinking it.  And, indeed, it’s been a very difficult week.  I wish I was  one of those people who could just chug water and be happy and healthy.  I’m a flavor addict.  If it doesn’t taste good, I want nothing to do with it.  I’ve tried some of those little bottled flavorings that you add to water, but they give me heartburn.  So, I don’t know what the future holds in store for me to drink… I might just have to bite the bullet and drink the flavorless water anyway.  I’m in this for the long run.

I’d like to say I’ve been doing exceptionally well with my food intake.  But I’m not feeling guilty about it, as Dr. M (the endocrinologist) said he doesn’t want me to change my eating habits until I get my blood workup done next month.  Even so, I’m consciously holding back and eating better.  Mostly.  Dr. M said he would be “teaching me” how to eat/avoid carbs etc. after the blood workup comes back.  I’m hoping when I go see  him again that I’ve lost some weight.

Even so, I have this scary symptom(s) that does not seem to abide by my rules.  It rears its ugly head whenever/wherever.  Usually when I have to stand for any length of time.  First I’ll break into a profuse sweat (soaking anything/anyone around me), then my hands will begin to shake, then my arms and, if I don’t find a place to sit fast enough, my entire body will tremble.  My breathing will come much faster and uncontrollable, and to the point where I will pass out.  The only resource to stop it is to sit down for around 15 minutes at least.  It can be terrifying.

I will be contacting my primary care doc about this one!

So, that’s about it for tonight.  Not so much.  I’m distracted and need to go quilt.

Thanks for stopping by and taking a look.  Blessings ~ Tamara


Confessions of An Office Accessory Junkie ~

Yes, that’s me.  I’m shamelessly addicted to office products!  Since I was about 10 years old, and got my first typewriter, I knew that I wanted to work in an office when I grew up.  But I had no idea the addiction that would bring.  Slowly it started by harmlessly collecting pens and pencils in school.  But by high school, I was carrying six to twelve Bic pens in my purse on a daily basis ~ but only the blue  ones, I hadn’t yet “graduated” to black.

I guess things didn’t really start to go downhill for me in an uncontrollable manner until after I got out of school and started my first real job working at a non-profit help agency as their Receptionist.  It was there I discovered bullfrog clips, LARGE paper clips ~ I’d only ever seen the small ones before ~ and then colored paper and file folder labels.  And it began to snowball as I continued in my career as Receptionist, moved “up” to Administrative Assistant and then Executive Assistant! 

By the time I reached my position at the American Heart Association as Admin Assistant to their IT Director, Marketing Director and Planned Giving Director, I was all about “decorator” accessories.  I wanted my tape dispenser to be floral and my stapler to be zebra striped.  Even my pens had to be exceptional for every day use, but I kept Bic for professional needs and went on to black super fine point Sharpies for my Notary Public responsibilities.

Glitter Gel pens for scrapbooking or descriptive writing!

Glitter Gel pens for scrapbooking or descriptive writing!

"Standard" desk pens

“Standard” desk pens

eyeglass holder

Desk eyeglass holder

I still keep “unusual” mousepads on hand, and yes, I recently contact-papered my desk because I just could not stand that awful “file cabinet beige” any longer!  I’m so ashamed!  When I realized about 10 years ago that I had, what could only be described as a “stockpile” of various pens at home, I knew there was a problem.  I found them… they were in various parts of my house being held in zippered pouches of all kinds.  I think I found five or maybe even six pouches of pens!  Some were floral, some plain, some were glittered, all were colorful.  I kept them hidden from my husband for fear that he’d like one and try to take it from me!  I bought him some mechanical pencils to keep him off track.

Then it happened ~ I started a new job in 2008 (where I currently am); a job that entails a lot of manual hard-copy filing.  When I first went into what were going to be “my files” to manage indefinitely, I almost went into cardiac arrest.  The labels on the file folders were in complete disarray and inconsistent ~ and worse ~ filed wrong!  That’s when I knew I had hit an all time low and was going over the edge with file folders and their labels.  I could handle that the majority of my files had to be that God-awful manila 1/3 cut folder, but I was able to placate myself with some of the “lesser” files and recolored some using blue, green, yellow, purple and red file folders.  I was even able to print some of the labels in color using the laser printer.  Such relief!  (BTW, I did manage to redo ALL 1500+ file folders so that their labels matched in font and style at least, and I refiled them correctly so they were appropriately alpha-filed!)

black and grey fantasy file folders sew kitty file folders Bird Garden file folders

I knew it wouldn’t be affordable or feasible to get some of the prettier file folders for my office, and I grew accustomed to having to deal with that.  But I am planning on purchasing some of these newer finds for my home office in the very near future.  You see, I can’t resist!  The colors are intense and exciting, and they come 12 in a pack!  How could I not?!

Don’t judge me because I’m addicted, or because I have good taste.  Indeed, be kind, it could be YOU!

Next week, my quest to find a matching stapler, tape dispenser and (dare I hope?) a staple puller!